When a young adult moves back home, the results can range anywhere from a sweet time to a nightmare. While there is no fool-proof formula, there are a number of measures parents and young adults can take to greatly reduce the chances of disaster.

For Parents

• Recognize the various adjustments and losses your young adult may be experiencing and grieving, such as being used to living with friends, doing all activities in peer community, and not having to make lifestyle changes to accommodate younger family members.
• Be willing to welcome them back in as a fellow adult, and not as your formerly teenaged child.

• Invite your young adult to brainstorm with you some ways to live together that are considerate of the ways you like to run your home, while also respectful of their independence and stage of life.
• Don’t hesitate to discuss all details such as taking turns using the laundry room, sharing cooking responsibilities, and establishing work and recreational spaces. You might be amazed by how creative your returning offspring can be!

For Young Adults

• Especially if your parents have been living as empty nesters, try to imagine how hard it can be for them to also lose some of their freedoms. And recognize they may be dealing with their own stresses and changes. Offer to give them space to connect with one another as needed.

• More people means more work to be done – usually for momma! (such as cleaning, meal planning, listening, conflict resolution, and so on). Understand that your help and newly-gained life experience will be needed to share the load during this time.

• Don’t forget about your parents’ jobs, interests, and other relationships. Be accommodating to make sure these values are allowed to flourish.
• Be sensitive to the living space your at-home siblings occupy. Specially invest in your brothers and sisters as this may be your final time to ever live under the same roof.
• Don’t view this time at home as a set-back or failure which will only discourage you. Rather, view this season as one of the twists and turns of life where you are moving forward because of what you’re learning and with whom you’re connecting.

Everyone

Communicate, be willing to learn from one another, make new memories, find ways to bond, and give much grace!

“O LORD, You are the portion of my inheritance and my cup; You maintain my lot. The LINES HAVE FALLEN to me IN PLEASANT PLACES; yes, I have a good inheritance. I will bless the Lord who has given me counsel; my heart also instructs me in the NIGHT SEASONS.” (Ps. 16:5-7)